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Thursday, September 26, 2013

Updates on Grandma

These are all post that were put on facebook during the period of time from when my Grandma had her stroke until she passed away.  While I don't really like to think much about seeing my Grandma like that in those few days at the hospital, I felt that it would be worth recording the memory of what took place.  Essentially this blog is for my girls to look back on and read later in their lives.  I want them to remember what a beautiful person our Grandma was and I want them to know she was so ready to go on to the place she worked all her life for - she was ready to go see her Lord.  I want them to know that while we were all struggling with our emotions of preparing to live life without Grandma, we were rejoicing b/c we knew where she was going.

September 6, 2013

She is beautiful. She is strong. She is blessed. She is my Grandma. My Grandma suffered a massive stroke last night and was care flighted from Fairfield to ETMC Tyler. They found a clot on her brain and they cannot give her the medicine that would break up the clot b/c she is on a blood thinner. She is listed in critical condition. Grandma cannot talk. There is a chance she can talk again, but she won't be able to walk again. Our family cannot thank you all enough for your immediate response to pray for our Grandma. We can only say thank you and ask that you please continue to lift her and our family up in your prayers.

My Grandma has beautiful hands. They tell a wonderful story of hardwork, love and faithfulness. Each line is simply beautiful. My girls wanted a picture of Grandma since they are not allowed in the CCU. Grandma held tight to my hand so that is the picture we took.

Grandma had a CAT scan today. Basically her brain is still swelling and they expect it to not let up for 2 more days. She is pretty lethargic and will get more so. There is still a chance the swelling will stop her heart or breathing. They gave her a feeding tube since she would/could not do the swallow test. After Tuesday they should be able to evaluate her condition and send her to a rehab nursing home for about 100 days or until she plateaus and then she will go to a long term nursing home in Fairfield.

We continue to thank God for all your prayers and we continue to pray for God's will to be done.

September 7, 2013

It's been a little over 48 hrs since Grandma suffered a massive stroke that has this far left her paralyzed on her right side as well as unable to talk and walk. They are still saying her brain is swelling, but our Grandma is so amazing. She has quite the grip with her left hand and when we are with her she holds on tight. She shrugged her shoulders and opened both eyes for a few seconds today. They are small things but her reactions to voices and touch makes us all believe that Grandma is aware we are there and that gives us all comfort.

Our family is so blessed to have such an amzing woman who we call Mom and Grandma. And it is so very apparent how many love and care for her beyond our family by the overwhelming response of prayer and kind words. We cannot say thank you enough and we continue to ask for your prayers. Even in such a difficult situation, we are made aware of all the blessings God has given our family.

September 9, 2013

Today Grandma was suppose to have gotten a G-button put in so she no longer has a feeding tube through her nose. It was also decided that she would be moving to Providence Park Nursing & Rehab here in Tyler probably tomorrow. Our family basically had two choices. We could elect to send her to hospice or a nursing home. It was not an option for her to not receive a G-button. No nursing home or even hospice would take her with a feeding tube in her nose. My Uncle Danny works with a group of nursing homes and Providence Park happens to be one of them. They will be able to help Grandma be comfortable and we will be able to visit her frequently.

Grandma is still the same. I am struggling at explaining this to my girls. Carli asked today when she could see Grandma and show her how she could spell Pawpaw's name. And I told her that Grandma was getting ready to go to heaven to see Pawpaw again. Carli didn't even hesitate when she said, "Then I want to go with her. Grandma misses Pawpaw and so do I!" I am at a loss as to how to explain to them that heaven is a good thing when in their little minds they see it as taking away their Grandma and Pawpaw. They know that God is good. They know that Jesus is good. They know heaven is a good place. But they cannot understand how can it all be good if the ppl they love go there and never come back.

We still are asking for your prayers for our Grandma. We would love to hear her voice again, to know that she knows we are with her, to see her open her eyes and recognize us all. We also know that Grandma is tired. That she has lived an amazingly blessed life and how selfish we are to want her to stay on this earth any longer. Please pray for wisdom in our words in trying to explain this process to our young children who have been so immensely blessed in having their Great-Grandma be such a huge part of their lives. And we thank you all for the prayers and kinds words of comfort you continue to offer us all. There are not words that can be written that can truly convey the gratitude we feel for you all.

September 12, 2013
From Aunt Carolyn:
If you've ever had someone, or yourself, in a hospital you know things can change really fast, and there is a lot of just sit and "wait 'n see"! The " wait 'n see" is what it seems we've been doing for several days. The hospital has done all they medically can do for my mom, so we are getting ready to move her to Providence Park here in Tyler. Mom has stated that she does not want to be kept alive in a condition like she is presently in, so we are just making sure she is kept as comfortable as possible. She is breathing on her own but is on a BPAP machine which just makes breathing a bit easier; she receives morphine shots for pain; and she has a temporary feeding tube.

If I understand it correctly, nursing homes will not accept anyone with a temporary feeding tube (through the nose), it must be permanent (in the stomach). They were going to do that Tuesday, but realized they couldn't because she was on blood thiners. So they discontinued those (Coumidin) and said they would do the procedure today. Today the blood is still not the right consistency, so they are doing the paper work to give her plasma and vitamin K to help with that. Then, we will wait to see how long it takes those things to work---they could still do the procedure today, but it could be tomorrow. Once the tube is in place, they will have to observe her for awhile (possibly 24 hours) before she can be moved.

I know this is long, but I hope is an accurate description of our current status. Please keep up your prayers for all of us.

Now, after I wrote all this, the nurse came in and said it will be tomorrow when they insert the feeding tube.

September 13, 2013
I haven't done a Grandma update in awhile mostly bc a small part of me still is naive enough to think of I don't say it then it isn't true. But unfortunately that is not the case.

I got to spend almost an hour alone with my Grandma on Wednesday night. I talked to her til I couldn't think of anything else to say and then I sang. Grandma didn't react until I stopped singing then she raised her hand and shrugged her shoulder. So I sang some more. Her body is old, and is tired. But her mind is still there and sometimes that makes it harder to take.

This morning while they were cleaning Grandma's room and prepping her for her gtube procedure they took her off her bpap to change her sheets and realized that she could not breathe on her own. Basically it was acting like a ventilator which is a violation of her dnr (do not resuscitate). So, tonight at 8 pm we will take Grandma off her bpap. 

 The last week has not been easy but the prospect of tonight is hard. Pls pray for peace and that Grandma not suffer. Pls pray for our family

September 14, 2013

"When Grandma gets to heaven, will she have angel wings? I hope they are beautiful. I bet they are pink. Grandma really liked pink. She told me so. Maybe we need to pray and tell God to make sure Pawpaw knows that Grandma will have pink angel wings in heaven so he can find her." - Carli

My beautiful Grandma is no longer suffering and we rejoice in knowing she is now whole again. What an amazing Godly woman and example she was to our family. We are beyond blessed and thankful to have called her ours.

May God bless you all for the prayers and words of comfort you have offered our family. Thank you from the bottom of our hearts.

Flowers from all of Grandma's Darlins'
Photo: Flowers from all of Grandma's Darlings

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